style92 (![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} style92) wrote,@ 2008-05-04 23:46:00 |
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I'm scared.
I had been feeling awful for a couple of weeks. Increased tiredness. headaches. I had just been wondering if I had been getting sick. But since it hadn't gone away, I decided to check my blood pressure.
I did it at walmart, and it was definitely not a resting rate. That's two things that make the test a little suspect, but it was the best I could do on a weekend that I had to work. my high number was a whopping 196. my low number was a 96. So, my blood pressure is definitely up.
I am already being medicated, but it looks like I'll have to have it adjusted. when I went on medication the first time, my done by a doctor blood pressure at resting was 150 over 120, and they visibly freaked. I've been doing better since, but I don't know what to make of my latest numbers. my high number would be the highest it's ever been, but my low number isn't. So maybe there's hope for me with a new diet and new meds.
But there's another issue at play here, related and making it worse. I've been... angrier, lately. for the last year. Anger has been building. And I'm not used to being angry. I come from an angry household. infact, my family name is sort of infamous for hot headed tempers where I come from, going back generations. We're also know for heart trouble. Great grandfather? died in his 40s from a stroke. Grandfather? 80s from a stroke. Father? still alive thank god, but suffered 2 (sort of 2 1/2) heart attacks. And the old family temper is rising. I was never known as an angry child. I saw how my father and brother got, and I said "I don't want to be like that." But for the last year those old barriers have been failing me. I suppose some old bitterness has been hardening into anger. And I don't want to feel that way.
But, ultimately you gotta believe things can get better.
I had been feeling awful for a couple of weeks. Increased tiredness. headaches. I had just been wondering if I had been getting sick. But since it hadn't gone away, I decided to check my blood pressure.
I did it at walmart, and it was definitely not a resting rate. That's two things that make the test a little suspect, but it was the best I could do on a weekend that I had to work. my high number was a whopping 196. my low number was a 96. So, my blood pressure is definitely up.
I am already being medicated, but it looks like I'll have to have it adjusted. when I went on medication the first time, my done by a doctor blood pressure at resting was 150 over 120, and they visibly freaked. I've been doing better since, but I don't know what to make of my latest numbers. my high number would be the highest it's ever been, but my low number isn't. So maybe there's hope for me with a new diet and new meds.
But there's another issue at play here, related and making it worse. I've been... angrier, lately. for the last year. Anger has been building. And I'm not used to being angry. I come from an angry household. infact, my family name is sort of infamous for hot headed tempers where I come from, going back generations. We're also know for heart trouble. Great grandfather? died in his 40s from a stroke. Grandfather? 80s from a stroke. Father? still alive thank god, but suffered 2 (sort of 2 1/2) heart attacks. And the old family temper is rising. I was never known as an angry child. I saw how my father and brother got, and I said "I don't want to be like that." But for the last year those old barriers have been failing me. I suppose some old bitterness has been hardening into anger. And I don't want to feel that way.
But, ultimately you gotta believe things can get better.
